- Their personalities. See TOP 10 rude one liners. - Charles Baudelaire. Apparently, the height of parental comedy is roasting your kids before they even realise what’s happening. Q: What's the difference between a female lawyer and a pitbull? judge JOKES (random) The cross eyed judge looked at the three defendants in the dock and said to the first one, "So how do you plead?" - Cicero I don't make love by kissing, I make love by dancing. ... Judge: “I thought I said that I never wanted to see you in here, again.” ... One fire truck and twenty cops show up to a call. What happened? All sorted from the best by our visitors. Browse them all here and grab a donut while you're at it. "Oh man, I just heard this joke about Comrade Stalin in my courtroom." "I wasn't talking to you" the judge replied. asked the driver. A: One's a spineless, poisonous blob. Absolutely hillarious rude one-liners! Dunkin Donuts burnt down. A: First he lies on one side and then on the other. The judge upon hearing the questions and answers thusfar asked both counselors to approach the bench. The reason one-liners make the best dad jokes is that it doesn’t matter if the audience is listening. A judge was annoyed to find that his car wouldn't start. "You mean to say that you don't know where the courthouse is?" A: Lipstick Q: What do you call a lawyer with an IQ of 80? - Fred Astaire Dancing is poetry with arms and legs. "The courthouse? One Liners - Lawyers Jokes. The judge told her to stop using crack and start showing it? The judge says "You've been brought here for drinking." The first judge says, "No way, I just gave someone 25 years in the gulag for it." Breasts don’t have eyes. Why do men find it difficult to make eye contact? o O o. The other is a form of sea life. - Deborah Love No one dances sober, unless he is insane. "I never said a word" the third defendant replied. 28. How do you get a sweet 80-year-old lady to say the F word? A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing. 1. Climbing in, he told the driver to take him to the halls of justice. Another judge stops him and asks what's so funny. He called a taxi, and soon one arrived at his house. "Not guilty" said the second defendant. "Where are they?" A: His partners What do lawyers use for birth control? A: Your Honor Q: What do you throw to a drowning lawyer? Enjoy a wide variety of funny Christian jokes, good clean jokes, and family safe jokes and religious humor. asked the incredulous judge. o O o. The drunk says, "Okay, let's get started." What is the difference between a tick and a lawyer? For an Irishman, talking is a dance. Funny Clean Courtroom Jokes . The largest collection of rude one-line jokes in the world. Funny Dance Quotes Group 5. by Stephen. Q: How does an attorney sleep? "I wan't to hear it" says the second judge. 42 Funny One Liner Jokes. Read on for 13 of her funniest and toughest one-liners about telling the truth, showing respect, and why she is always the boss. on March 25, 2013. Clean Christian jokes, funny jokes, free jokes, and clean jokes and humor about lawyers, criminals, judges, the law, cops, and more. A drunk was in front of a judge. -Henry Youngman Confucius says, "Women who sit on judges lap, get honorable discharge". The optimal ratio for the best dad joke is two parts funny: one part groan. You should make a point of trying every experience once, excepting incest and folk-dancing. These funny cop jokes are so cheeky and punny you'll be ticketed for laughing too hard.